Today sees the start of a series of posts to help you with relationships.

One of the issues I deal with frequently as a Life Improvement Coach is relationships and often relationships that have broken down. Whenever I help people to reunite or to reignite the spark in their relationship I get such a buzz!

So, if your relationship is struggling or you’ve separated but want to know how to get back your ex, read on…

When you first break up, you’ll find yourself having all sorts of thoughts and emotions. This is a dangerous time for you! And… it’s a time you shouldn’t be making decisions about your relationship and how to get back your ex!

That might seem like a strange thing to say, because your first instinct is to try and get your ex back as soon as you can. You’ll be worried they might find someone else or that they’ll fall out of love with you.

However, it’s important to put those thoughts to one side and focus your attention on an action plan that will have your ex begging for you to come back.

So, instead of rushing in like a bull at a gate, step back, let go and give yourself time by following this 3-step plan to get back your ex…

Step 1 - Stop Everything
Give yourself a day or two to think things through and to calm your thoughts. Preferably, go away for a couple of days. Book yourself into a hotel, away from friends and family.

The last thing you want at this time is advice from others, however well-meaning they are. This is your life and you need to make your own decisions.

Don’t use this time to feel sorry for yourself. Use it to simply gather your thoughts, accept the situation and start to create an action plan to win back your ex.

Use the time to gather your thoughts and prepare for the comments and thoughts of friends and family. They’ll all want to help and they’ll all have a view as to what you should do.

How are you going to handle them?

What are you going to say?

Think through your answers, but whatever you do, don’t enter into conversations that bad-mouth your ex and don’t let others do it in front of you. Find ways to change the subject. Find your way to deal with things.

Step 2 - Stay Away From Your Ex… For Now
This is very important. Chasing after your ex immediately after a break-up will cause more harm than good and will probably drive them away for ever.

Your emotions and your ex’s emotions will be all over the place and contact at this time will simply lead to arguments and will reinforce in your ex’s mind why you separated in the first place.

You both need space and time to come to terms with your thoughts and emotions at this very difficult time, so don’t be tempted to contact them. Instead, move on to step 3…

Step 3 - Create An Action Plan
This step vital to your success! Random actions like sending presents, calling on impulse or turning up out of the blue will almost certainly lead to failure.

So, avoid the temptation to dive in and do something straight away.

Remember step 1?

It’s important to let go and calm yourself before you do anything.

OK, back to step 3…

To get back your ex, you’ll need to attract them back to you.

You’ll need to create a plan that will make them fall in love with you all over again…

A plan that’ll show your ex things will be different when you get back together…

A plan that’ll convince your ex you can be together for ever.

At this point you’re creating curiosity, attraction, passion and love from your ex. Think of it as winning them over for the first time. If you can get your ex to feel those sort of emotions, they’ll overpower anything that’s been felt in the past.

Think carefully about how your relationship was and how you’d like it to be. Above all else, focus on how you want your relationship to be… feel it. Close your eyes and feel your ex in your arms… feel the love between you.

Now, work on ideas to attract your ex back… write them down.

It’s at this point that you’ll probably need some advice. Take your time… don’t rush into ideas given by others or that you read. Think everything through.

I’ve worked with many people on relationship issues with great success. You can find out more about relationship coaching by clicking here or you can get some great ideas from The Magic of Making Up by T. W. Jackson. TW gives you all the tools you need, plus much more, and will show you exactly how to get back your ex.

More on overcoming procrastination in my next post, but today I
want to share a poem with you…

I came across this some time ago and it spent sometime pinned to my
wall as a motivator for when times where tough!

Yes, I’ve been through tough times too… and I’ll go through them
again… as we all will.

It’s how we handle tough times that’s crucial…

Anyway, I was sent this recently by a friend and it reminded me
just how much it helped me through those difficult times.

Copy it into your word processor, enlarge the print and put it
somewhere you’ll see it. Read it at least once a day for the next
month or so to help you push on through when the going gets
tough!

I’m not sure who wrote it, so if you know, please let me know by
dropping me an email.

OK, here goes…

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill.
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns.
And many a fellow turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man.
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor’s cup.
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt.
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit,
It’s when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit.

See you next time.

Have a great day!

This is the third in my series of posts to help you in overcoming procrastination…

Procrastination is often a symptom of a poor self-image.

You may well be thinking… “How can that be?”… or “What’s self-image got to do with procrastination?”.

The answer is simpler than you might think and isn’t difficult to understand…

You see, we often link performance to self-worth. Unless we achieve perfection in our efforts we consider ourselves to be a failure and, since perfection is incredibly difficult to achieve, there’s too much at stake to even start a project. We put too much pressure on ourselves, by ‘insisting’ that we achieve perfection. By procrastinating, we avoid having to make judgement… we avoid the possibility of failure.

Unfortunately, we also avoid the possibility of success!

So, how can we break out of this dilemma?

What’s the first step to Overcoming Procrastination?

The best way is to create a safety net for yourself. Look at your goal or task and ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can happen to me if I don’t achieve perfection?”

Maybe, you’ll get a little criticism… maybe you’ll have to rework some of your project… maybe you’ll feel a little embarrassed… maybe… maybe… maybe!

Now look at the positive reactions you’ll get for a job well done!

Praise from your peers and boss… appreciation for a great effort… maybe even a pay rise!

Simply remember self-worth does not equal performance!

As you start towards your goals, simply say to yourself, “Whatever happens, my self-worth will still be the same, I am safe and will remain safe, whatever the results of my efforts”.

When you provide a safety net like this for yourself, you’ll find you’re much calmer and much more likely to start your project.

Try it today!

Look out for my next post to help you with overcoming procrastination… coming soon!

Take care and have a great day.

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

This is the second in my series of posts to help you with overcoming procrastination…

Procrastination is one of the most damaging habits you can develop.

Did you notice the use of the word develop?

You weren’t born with procrastination built into you. You developed the habit of putting things off as you grew older and as society, your peers, your parents, teachers and many other people chipped away at your confidence and self-belief.

Now that’s a bold statement, if ever you heard one! Yes?

Take a look at any small child…

Do they hesitate when they see something they want? You bet they don’t!

Just about every young child is in a rush to walk, talk and create mayhem!

So what happens? Why do we develop this debilitating habit of procrastination?

For many of us, it’s a safety mechanism. A way of putting off trying something… so we can’t be seen as a failure. So we can’t be criticised for completing a task that’s not up to scratch.

Hey, if we wait long enough, someone else might just come along and finish things off for us!

Look at people around you. Do they put things off? Do they delay things they could easily attempt today… right now!

Change the way you view things.

Every ‘failure’ is a lesson learned. Every success takes you closer to your dreams and to the abundance you deserve.

Every success grows your business.

Make an effort to stop procrastinating… NO! Make a decision to stop procrastinating… right now!

Start every day by working on your major project, don’t procrastinate by checking your post or your emails… do that later. Otherwise, you may get diverted from your main project for the whole day. Now don’t tell me that’s never happened to you before! Of course it has! It’s happened to me as well!

So here’s the plan…

Start your working day by working for at least two hours on your major project… before you do anything else.

Then see how much difference it makes to your business, your confidence and to your happiness!

Look out for my third post to help you with overcoming procrastination… coming soon!

Take care and have a great day.

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

This is the first in a series of posts to help you with overcoming procrastination. I was going to post this last week, but put it off… Tee hee!

Sorry couldn’t resist that one!

To procrastinate, according to the Oxford Dictionary means to defer action. Put simply, procrastination is the art of putting things off!

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Don’t put off until tomorrow, what you can do today”. Well, a procrastinator changes that to, “Don’t do today, what you can put off until tomorrow!”

OK, that’s the fun over. Procrastination is serious. It holds most of us back at sometime or another and I consider it to be something of an addiction… in that it’s very difficult to give up!

Over the next few posts, I’ll be discussing, in detail, the signs of procrastination, the main reasons why people procrastinate and methods to help with the process of overcoming procrastination.

Procrastination not only prevents many people achieving their life goals, it helps create negative feelings of self-worth and destroys confidence. So, it’s something that needs to be tackled in a way that will bring about lasting change.

For that reason I’ll be telling giving you a practical techniques to put an end to procrastination for ever!

But more on that in the next post. For now, I’d like you to decide how much of a procrastinator you are.

Make a list of times you’ve put things off recently. How does it make you feel?

Where would you be now, if you hadn’t delayed important decisions or projects?

Don’t beat yourself up and don’t make judgements about yourself. That’s not the idea. It is important, however, as part of the process in overcoming procrastination, to accept you’re a procrastinator… if that’s the case, so we can work to provide a solution.

See you next time.

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

Don’t underestimate the power of encouragement!

A word of encouragement means so much to those who are trying to achieve something. It gives people such a lift, making difficult tasks so much easier.

So go on, when you see someone struggling with a task, give them a helping hand… heap some praise on them! Don’t hold back… make them feel extra special!

A word of praise is never wasted! And furthermore, don’t wait for someone to achieve something outstanding before you praise them. Give credit to people for trying hard. Give people credit for doing their best… even if they haven’t achieved great results. It will help them to get up and try again tomorrow!

So start today. Look for every opportunity to praise people.

Encourage every success, no matter how small.

Encourage every effort.

Encourage… encourage… encourage!

It will bring a smile to someone’s face and make the world a better and happier place to be.

Encourage someone today and watch them flourish!

Encourage someone every day and watch your own blessings grow too!

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

I have a very simple message for you today…

Look for the positives in everything that happens to you. Look for
something good, even in adversity!

Now that may sound strange… even impossible!

But believe me, it’s not! And furthermore, it’s the only way to
be successful and happy in life.

Look, we’re all going to have things happen in our lives that we
don’t like. We all have things happen to us that, at the time they
happen, we wish hadn’t happened!

But take a step back.

Look for the gold amongst the rubble.

Look for a way to turn things around.

Look for a way to build.

Look for a way to turn anything that, at first looks bad, into
something that’ll benefit you.

Sometimes adversity’s a sign that you need to rebuild… to start
over. To revisit your life goals.

So, don’t get down…

Don’t look back…

Don’t think to yourself, “If only…”

Take stock and then…

Move forward!

Rebuild!

Create wealth and abundance!

So go on… take the world by storm!

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

Sometimes, as adults we forget what gives us pleasure and excitement in life.

We become just a little bit too serious!

To get some of your youthful energy back, try this simple, but very effective life coaching exercise…

Find a photo of yourself, that you really like, from when you were between the age of 5 and 12.

Think back to those days and remember the good things that you knew you could do.

Maybe you were good at sports, jigsaw puzzles, dancing, singing… list them all.

Now visualise yourself doing the things you’ve listed and remind yourself how happy they made you.

Now ask yourself, “How can I bring more of this happiness and joy into my life?”

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones

Spread some happiness today…

Make someone smile!

Say a few happy words…

Tell a joke…

Do something helpful or useful…

Make your boss a cup of tea!

Make your employees a cup of tea!

Do something for your partner that they normally do for you.

Go out on a night that you normally stay in.

Do something different.

Smile at a complete stranger as you walk past them.

Go on… make someone smile today!

It’ll make you smile too!

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones
Life Improvement Coach

Create a definite plan for carrying out you desire and begin working towards it right away… whether you’re ready or not to put your plan into action!

Don’t delay!

Don’t wait until you’re completely ready… because that time may never come!

Start now…

Start today…

Get some momentum going and you’ll be surprised at just how easy it is to reach your goals!

Have a great day!

Keith L Jones

Life Improvement Coach